The Jaws of Life Rescued Cow and Bear

After returning home from our Christmas funtoonery in Iowa, we were surprised to find that Cow and Bear did not run up to greet us. In their last job review, greeting us at the door was indicated as one of their “Key Responsibilities and Functions” and one of the top five ways in which they “Promote a Sense of Team.” Just as we were seriously considering having a surprise performance review, we realized our bedroom door was closed.

No cats in sight, a closed bedroom door… this couldn’t mean good things for our carpet.

Cow and Bear often have long wrestling matches where they tumble great distances. It usually starts with some gentle slapping. Then licking and biting. Then they embrace in a hug and sway side to side until they fall over and roll off into the sun set. We call this the “Cow and Bear Show” and it is pretty entertaining to watch – assuming you share our low standard of entertainment excellence. During these rolls, it isn’t unusual for them to knock something over or fall off the bed. Clearly, they must have been having a private performance of the Cow and Bear Show when they accidently rolled into the door and shut themselves in.

Tim pushed open the door, but it only moved a couple of centimeters before stopping. (How European, huh? The cats are metric so we try to accommodate their preferences.) We peaked in through the crack and saw both cats staring back at us with a sad look in their eyes. They knew the Cow and Bear Show had gone to far.

With force, we were able to open the door just enough for the cats to squeeze out. Well, Bear could squeeze out but Cow had to really suck it in. I expected then to run upstairs to their litter box, but when they didn’t I was even more afraid of what we would find on the other side of the door. I stuck my nose in the crack and gave a whiff… no Cow and Bear odor. We concluded that they must have just recently locked themselves in. But they were also obviously in there long enough to panic and try to start digging their way back out. Shreds of carpet and carpet padding were everywhere. Looking down, it was clear that the carpet was pulling up and that was what was blocking the door from opening.

Tim had to break out some manly tools to finally get the doors open. A bald patch in our carpet is all that remains of this near-tragic performance of the Cow and Bear Show.

True story.