Monday, September 20, 2010

Focusin ... for reals

This is a quote from an actual magazine ad…

“His math homework is two days late.

It’s in his backpack, which he left on the bus.

Again.

It feels like everyone is giving up on him.

I need a way to help him, but all I have is tears.”



Whoa.

Unnecessary drama alert! Wooooot! Woooooot! Woooot! Dingdingding!! ALARM! ALARM! ALARM!



That’s my unnecessary drama alarm. I have it set to “ironic”.

Anyway…Guess what that is an ad for? ADHD drugs 4 kidz.

Now, I’m not denying that a small percentage of children truly need and benefit from pharmaceuticals. That’s a decision for parents and doctors to make, not some random judgmental outsider (like myself). But… Really, pharmaceutical company? I mean… really?? Your desperation to broaden your consumer base is getting a bit embarrassing for all of us. Now you want parents to medicate their children for leaving stuff on the bus?

The “mom” in the ad is hilariously fragile. Surely parents like this only exist in the fantasies of drug company CEOs. I mean, we all have bad days where perhaps we entertain the idea of drugging our children. (Ok, I've never entertained that thought ...but as this blog clearly demonstrates, my children are perfect and cannot be improved with any child-enhancing drugs.) Maybe the pharmaceutical company just happened to catch this fictional mom at a bad time. But, honestly, if you are going to break down in tears and toss pills at your kid every time his homework is late, you are clearly living in The Valley of the Dolls (or beyond).

(simulated drug company CEO fantasy)

Here’s what I imagine will be their next ad campaign:

“He refused to eat his broccoli at dinner.

Again.

I feel like everyone has given up on him eating lima beans.

I need a way to help him, but all I have is tears.”



So… yeah.

...

(FYI... "Focusin" in the title is a reference to the Simpson's take on ADHD drugs and not the name of the actual drug from the ad.)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Amen! from Fat uncle Nick